A lack of confidence in your ability can have a direct effect on your ability! When we think we cannot do something, we limit ourselves simply with the negative mindset, engaging in a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thought processes and belief systems effect behavior, and therefore believing we cannot accomplish something makes it more likely we will not.
Engaging yourself in a healthier mindset, with rational thought challenging and an attempt toward more positive ideation, can work wonders toward helping you reach your goals. Unfortunately, feelings of inadequacy frequently get in the way of such a mindset. This lack of confidence may limit you to feeling uncertain about your abilities, which may stop you from believing in yourself, which may stop you from developing a plan, which may stop you from meeting your goal, which will increase negative ideation… and here you see the negative cycle we create in our minds to keep us stuck!
Often these negative thoughts come with negative emotion, and this emotion has the ability to further blunt your ability to think rationally. When faced with a problem, you must take a step back to calm those emotions, and then work on objective problem solving to prove to yourself you are effective, and you have the ability to accomplish this goal…
- “I do not know how to lose weight.”
- Have you educated yourself about weight loss?
- What do you know about how to lose weight?
- What resources are available to you?
- If you do not know, have you looked into this (ask friends, Google, etc.)
- “I know the steps to losing weight, but I CAN’T lose weight… nothing works for me!”
- Have you planned appropriately?
- Have you made space in your life to create some changes?
- Have you prepared yourself, your environment, and those around you about upcoming changes?
- Are you ready to make a change?
- Do you have the right supports in place?
- Have you developed a realistic plan for yourself?
- “There are too many things in the way, I have too many barriers to weight loss.”
If you’ve done all of this, then you have taken great steps toward personal effectiveness. If you continue to feel inadequate, or find yourself saying “I can’t,” then I challenge you again to think of whether you are rationally thinking through all options. Enlist someone else (professional or family/friend/support) to help you problem solve, help you increase your confidence, learn, and overcome barriers. If the feelings of inadequacy persist, consider seeking professional help through a therapist, because there may be a larger issue underlying whatever is keeping you stuck. Regardless, keep as positive as possible, continue to seek knowledge, be kind to yourself, and work to believe in yourself!
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