The people we surround ourselves with can impact our happiness and wellbeing. People with high negativity can rub off and make you more negative, increasing your own levels of stress and disease. Negativity attracts negativity. Positivity attracts positivity. If you allow negative people to influence you, you will turn out to be like them.
Consider your relationship:
- What is the main emotion you experience with this person?
- Are you happy most of the time?
- Does some other emotion take up the majority of your time in this relationship?
- Are you spending time thinking of how this relationship could change?
- Thinking through arguments with this person?
- Thinking of ways this person has impacted you negatively?
- Are you surrounding yourself with negativity?
- Does this person always have something to complain about?
- Cannot see the positive side of anything?
- Is always complaining?
- Does the person spend all the conversation talking about themselves and never asking how you are doing?
- Do they give you time to vent?
- Is this person making healthy lifestyle decisions?
- Do you agree with the general choices this person makes?
- The way they live their life?
- The people they surround themselves with?
- Do you respect this person?
- Look up to this person?
- Do you find yourself often questioning aspects of the relationship and whether it is healthy for you?
If you continually find yourself thinking about a particular relationship in a negative way, take some time to really answer the above questions. If there is more bad than good, can you problem solve any way to make a change? Open up communication? Set boundaries?
It is important to remember the power we can let other people have over our emotions, thoughts, and behavior. This can impact your reaching your goals, and truly change your functioning and level of perceived happiness or contentment with life. Set limits with those where you need to improve your own wellbeing. And, consider ending the relationship if necessary.